But no matter what country we’re physically located in, there is one common thread in my grandmother Fafoga’s line that ties us together: Whenever there is a family gathering — be it Christmas, Easter or milestone birthdays that bring my aunties and uncles all the way from New Zealand (or even further from Perth) — we do a talent show called ‘Items’. The author is in the front wearing orange. Yes, it might sound traumatising. And in some ways, it was. But if you wanted to express yourself, show your talent and be showered with encouragement and support regardless of the time or effort you put in (admittedly, sometimes very little), ‘Items’ was the time and place for it. Our Fafoga’s line expanded on the moment where a siva would be performed and evolved into any ‘Item’ — be it large or small. However, the love and honour behind the act you performed held similar weight. If my Uncle Fraser was in town for a gathering he’d usually ‘MC’ the event, another nod to traditional Samoan culture wherein someone in the family who has the gift of verbal communication will be deemed the ‘orator’, the mouthpiece of the family at formal events. Sometimes family traditions can be stifling, expectations can be placed on you that are a matter of culture and not the one of the country you are living in. Our family put an afakasi spin on Samoan traditions and as such, we could perform a dance to “Tragedy” by Steps or bomb a magic trick, but with the safety net of a loving and supportive audience. We’ve lost a number of family members who kept these traditions alive, but, even so, when I share anything with a crowd, nerves could be getting the best of me… And then I feel the nudge of my ancestors telling me, just like when I was a kid “give them your item, show them what you can do, or we’ll make you rub our feet”.